To the tune of “Royals” by Lorde

    I’ve never seen a diamond except on a stylus
    I cut my teeth on Discwasher and Zerostat
    And I’m not proud of my streaming DAC
    In a big black box, looks impressive
    But every song’s like
    Gold teeth chomping on glass menageries of spinning CDs
    Bloodstains, flywheels, trashin’ the 45 rpms from Music Matters
    We don’t care
    We’re spinning Goldmunds in our dreams
    But everybody’s like
    Roon, Spotify, TIDAL on your iPhone
    Jet planes, VPI, miles of gold cables
    We don’t care
    We aren’t caught up in your love affair

    And we’ll always love vinyls (vinyls)
    It just runs in our blood
    That kind of luxe is just for us
    We crave a different kind of buzz
    Let me be your tonearm (baby)
    You can call me unipivot
    And baby, I’ll track (I’ll track, I’ll track, I’ll track)
    Let me live that fantasy

    My friends and I, we’ve cracked the code
    We count our dollars as they flow into the ether
    And everyone who knows us knows
    That we’re not OK with this, we didn’t come from money
    But every song’s like got some noise but still we love it
    RCA, Decca, trippin’ in the listening room
    Bloodstains, Doshi, trashin’ the hotel room at CES
    We don’t care
    We’re spinning vinyls in our dreams
    But everybody’s like
    Jarrett, Yo-Yo, Lorde in Copper, sort of
    Jet planes, Fremer, tigers on a gold leash
    We don’t care
    We aren’t caught up in your love affair

    And we’ll always love vinyls
    It don’t run except at 33 and a third for us
    That kind of luxe is surely us
    We crave a JRT Dark Star kind of buzz
    Let me be your tonearm (sadly not Jelco anymore)
    You can call me DJ Andy
    And baby, I’ll rule (I’ll rule, I’ll rule, I’ll rule)
    Let me live that fantasy

    Oh
    Oh (oh, oh)
    It’s bigger than we ever dreamed
    And I’m in love with being king
    Oh
    Oh (oh, oh)
    Life is great without a CD player
    We aren’t caught up in your love affair

    And we’ll never love CDs (yada)
    It don’t run at 24/192 for us
    That kind of bandwidth just ain’t for us
    We crave a different kind of beat
    Let me play you vinyls
    You can call me on another day, please
    And baby, I’ll spin (I’ll spin, I’ll spin, I’ll spin)
    Let me live that fantasy

    Header image courtesy of Pexels.com/cottonbro.

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